Paper 2

Jealously occurs in relationships, but facebook can increase a couples jealously level which will interfere with their happiness. The social network can become addictive. People can reconnect with their old boyfriends or girlfriends. Face book over-informs people. We already know that face book can be an incredible tool for building and strengthening relationships. We also know that it can harm a relationship as well.
　
The social network can become addictive. People spend a lot of time on face book. The conversations with friends and colleagues are interesting. The time goes by faster when your on face book. Psychologist Csikszentmihalyi named this experience as flow. Flow is a state in which one is immersed in an experience that is rewarding in and of itself, a state in which we feel we are one with the experience, in which “action and awareness are merged.” (Qtd Ben-Shahar Tal, 86). An example of flow is, one day I had to go to work. I was early, so I decided to log in. I told myself that I was only going to be online until it was time to go to work. I had notifications and messages. My boyfriend and I were writing back and forth. I had been online for an hour. I looked at the time and I realized I was running late for work. Even though I knew I was going to be late, the conversation with my partner seem to be more interesting. I was willing to be late for work because I was in the zone. I find face book interesting, I feel the complete opposite about going to work. I’ve done this on numerous occasions. Many people are addicted to face book. This is a problem that must be solved. I saw a video of a girl named Clarissa who has admitted she is addicted to face book. She had to study for a test but instead she went on face book. Clarissa said she cannot study in her house because she will automatically go on face book. When she has access to a computer, she will go log on to face book. Her gpa was a 4.0 last semester and she doesn’t think it will happen this semester because of her addiction to face book. (Face book Ruined my Life video). This generation is allowing face book to take over their life. It is sad that people make face book a priority instead of an option, this will change how a person will view the level of importance on certain things. For example, Clarissa is allowing her grades to suffer because face book is her priority. People need to wake up and realize the amount of time they spend on face book is unhealthy.
　
People can reconnect with their old boyfriends or girlfriends. A man understands that his girlfriend had a past but  that doesn't mean he waould like to see his girlfriend's ex boyfriend writing a comment on her wall. It is embarrassing because not only does he see her talking to her ex boyfriend, so does the rest of her friends on facebook. This can cause tension in the relationship. The boyfriend may feel like there is something more going on than a friendly hello. Men always know how other men think. Males don’t only want friendships from females. There is always a hidden agenda. The boyfriend may feel like the ex boyfriend is going to pretend to be his girlfriend’s friend. Then when the couple has a fight, the ex boyfriend will be there for her and consol her. For example, my cousin was dating this guy for three years before they broke up. She was single was a long time and one day her friend introduced her to a guy that she works with. The guy was interested in my cousin, he asked her for her number. She said yes. They have been dating ever since. The couple have been dating for one year. My cousin was on face book and she received a friend request from her ex boyfriend. She accepted his friend request because she was over him and she knew nothing would happen between them. Her ex boyfriend wrote on her wall. She wrote back. My cousin’s boyfriend saw that her ex boyfriend wrote on her wall, he was furious. They had an argument about this topic for a week. The ex boyfriend said “Hi, how have you been?…btw I miss you.” The term btw means by the way. My cousin said “I’m good and yourself.“ They were commenting back and forth but the conversation didn’t get impropriate. He was upset because my cousin accepted his friend request without telling him and he feels disrespected by what her ex boyfriend wrote on her wall. Her boyfriend thinks that she will go back to her ex boyfriend because they were together for three years and he was her first love. Her boyfriend is insecure because he knows her ex has a place in her heart that he can never take away. This caused their relationship to have many issues. If he didn’t read that comment, he would have no reason to doubt that his girlfriend wouldn‘t go back to her ex boyfriend. The couple wasn’t happy with one another anymore and broke up. It is sad that their relationship went down the drain because of a few words exchanged on face book. One day people will go back to communicating the “old fashion way” by talking to other another. Couples have to be secure in their relationship. Do not allow face book take away your happiness with your partner.
　
　
Face book over-informs people. The social network informs everyone of a person’s relationship status, when their tagged in photos, finding out plans with your partner’s friends, would be an unknown person commenting on your partner’s wall. You sense there is a bit of flirting going on. You will feel jealous, angry, hurt. You have two thousand thoughts at one time, one will be your mind creating an imagine of the unknown person and your partner being intimate. While this imagine is in your mind, you will make irrational decisions. You get in contact with your partner and tell him how you feel. I know many girls who have done this with their boyfriends. There was a study on college students to analyze the effect facebook has on relationships. There was 308 respondents. The participants were asked two questions. How likely are you to monitor your partner’s activities on facebook? How likely are you to become jealous after your partner has added an unknown member of the opposite sex? The results of the study stated that accessibility of information: increased information about the interactions of significant others, lead to an increase in monitoring and jealously for 19.1% of participants. Relationship jealous: 16.2% of respondents were explicitly linked to facebook use contributing to jealously. Facebook as addicted: 10.3% of participants had a major difficultly limiting the amount of the time he or she looked at his or partner facebook profile. Lack of context: 7.4% of respondents referenced how facebook can be ambiguous and that without context, jealously can be spurred over misunderstandings. This study was published in the Cyber Psychology & Behavior journal. The results of this study show more than an increase in the jealously rate. It shows that once the participants begin to investigate their partners profile, the feeling of jealously will most likely occur. Other factors such as lack of context and being addicted to facebook can occur as well.
　
Face book is a social network so people can communicate on the web. Couples have to understand that face book isn’t the place to play profile investigator. You should trust the person you are with. Do not get upset if your partner is speaking to a person of the opposite sex. You have to be strong minded and don’t doubt your partner’s ability to stay faithful to you. Jealousy is a powerful emotion and it can sometimes ruin a relationship if it gets out of hand. Losing your partner because of face book isn’t worth your happiness. If your partner makes you happy, why are you going to let a website determine the length of your relationship and happiness.